loose arse ( care and feeding )
+++
"wot's th difference between boys and girls ?"
"girls have looser holes"
***
jenny
***
i purchased some drugs
to whiel away my time
hang on
ill just get some
to consume
..
..
..
resin ie
***
and breathe out
breathe out **** ya
***
HUGE COUGHING FIT
***
ah
good drugs that
***
no ya duumb computer
i dont wanna watch ass3
well maybe just once
hmm
bit early for anal *** videos
music on
random
go
golden earring
'radar love'
he must be goin in th dark
***
gday and welcome to
th difficult reading hour
+++
barbie girl bought some
pants with crazy kinda tartan
pinkie design
jeez i dunno
anyway
i liked em and said so
and remarked to chrissie when barbie girl went to put em away
ya know
if ya put a really bright lime green top with them it be really umm
and barbie girl walked back in th room
she's worn em once
and yeah
with a bright green top
hmm
cool as
***
selena had this great little number th other day
gorgeous top
looked like green crushed velvet
"with perky titties inside it"
there was that
***
ya wanna go watch loose arse perform on stage ?
"could be fun"
"he got a good voice paulie"
"go way back"
i gotta stop callin im loose arse in public hey
***
kylie minogue
'track no12'
***
now kylie hasnt got a loose arse
"how th **** do ya know that ?"
got me there
***
"i'll bet ya michael hutchence tried to **** her in th arse"
***
"i'll make ya sing ya *****"
"ya spilt my coffee"
***
think i know why i woke up with such a good hard on this morning
***
i looked down
christ
i havent seen you in a while
***
it's th larger version
***
"can i send a letter to kylie minogue askin er ?"
no
"spoils****t ****head"
***
kylie minogue
'track no06'
***
"hey man?"
"it's playin another kylie track"
"means i can continue to heap **** on er"
that aint what happens under th cir***stances
i think
it aint piled anyway
"**** off paulei"
***
could ya imagine that great arse ?
wtih massive piles
i know
it;s sick
***
"no cu***bers for a while hey ?"
jen **** off
***
"i was just gettin warmed up"
"listenin to red blooded woman"
***
can we have somethin else mr music ?
hang on a sec
+++
nirvana
'about a girl'
***
been wearin my battle of the ***es ****rt
guys kick ass
***
kylie minogue
'still standing'
***
hmm
***
fukcin windows
***
kylie minogue
appears to be on high rotation in th random memory
of th wizards computer tonight
+++
bill hicks
'politics in america'
***
placebo
'bulletproof cupid'
+++
man
i was shakin my head
hairs long enough again now
spun
***
broadsliding unicycles
at ten paces
****head
***
robin ford
'prison of love'
***
was thinkin on
bennie and jane
bennie's mum
bennie wants to go boys bike riding
unicyclin with th wizard
hookin thru
posts
and ppl
and traffic
and maybe learn somethin off th old man
but um
still reticent about jane
+++
ya dont infest my brain
'every day
like ya used to
but liek th wise man said
an ex
is an ex
for a reason
***
cant afford to play with you sweetheart
sorry
***
i f yur ****in em
they're costin ya money
always
***
if ya aint got it
sometimes ya haveta
just not return calls
***
pj harvey
'down by the water'
***
janes other son
pj
is home
back from nz
***
jane doesnt hear anything
but what jane thinks
she's aware of it
***
as am i
***
not here to keep you happy
***
ears are burning
th boys rang me on my birthday
a coupel weeks ago
***
something for kate
'captain'(million miles an hour)
***
dean's got his unicycle back
but he aint ridin it
keeps bustin it
sellin it
to buy somethin stronger
a muni he says
he cant ride beside me at th mo
my light weight give me too many advantages
***
i broke a lot of bits too
in th beginning
was ridin along
and th left pedal just fell off th unicycle
really old codger
walkina long th pavement
beside me
with a cane
to my left
was dicey
but i didnt hit him as i came down
bout as close as it gets
to th edge
***
if ya gunna drop into a bowl on a unicycle
ya gotta check yur testicle factor first
***
led zeppelin
'the rain song'
***
do re mi
'track no 13'
***
loose arse said i had a passion for music
***
i can dig it
just went background thru over and around
the rain song
***
the who
'magic bus'
***
nickie kidman and some guy
'come what may'
***
sorry
i umm
dont tend to remember boys nams
***
marianne faithfull
'pirate jenny'
***
"hi paulie"
***
more drugs over here
quick
+++
"jenny and paulie's pirate tv version nine"
***
"no sound"
"no script"
"no vision"
"tv for th blind deaf and dumb"
"totally imaginary"
***
"that'll be twenty bucks"
***
foo fighters
'learn to fly'
***
gone flyin...
***
ah i did save it
i stood on th powerboard
was adjusting th aerial on th telly
telly was ravin on about
th pope's dyin
***
barbie girl bought
live baby live today
inxs cd
***
i had a nice fly on th unicycle
"wheel"
surfin even
anyway
just floatin along
doin my own thing s
bout a dozen car horns
really loud chick in an eh holden
how ****in australian is that ?
and a guy down in th dark
flyin under th trees
on th bike path
on th big road
ah man
most of it was umm
just sitnorm
usual ****
different day
dancin on th wheel
puttin miles on th dial
not that nice lookin chick in th four wheel drive though
i went bush
and cut across th grass
and she gave me a huge smile
ah me
i do it cause i can
**** hey
***
telly off
**** it
stupid boob tube
***
and we're back to ass3
just booted meda player
****er died without storin where it was last
you know
typical ****in reality
might watch it again
play
"if she's not lovin that"
"she's one hell of an actress"
yeah alright jen
***
makin all th right noises anyway
she's upside down
so if she squirts all over er own face
i'll believe ya ok
***
"devil child"
***
alright
who just rolled a ****in joint ?
i hope you brought enough for everybody
just th two of us hey
i can live with that
meeting adjourned
***
"i'm gettin bored with her squeelin paulie"
"tell her to shut th **** up"
"shutup *****"
show some patience jen
***
"stupid ****in blonde *****"
***
"does this one suck his cock after he pulls it out of her arse ?"
yur thinkin of a different one
"oh ok"
***
"do ya think she should ?"
has he been nice to er ?
"let me get back to ya"
***
"i dint get enough of th story"
***
"had to abandon it"
***
so did ya just jump to th good bits ?
"i'm assuming they kept those"
so ya wouldnt give it two stars then ?
"no i ****ing wouldnt"
well okay then
***
"gotta be hard on th shoulders"
"doin that upside down on one foot ceramic floor tiles"
***
does that give it an extra credit does it ?
"degree of difficulty"
like ****in in a mini with a six foot one girl ?
"something liek that"
now she was dead funny
***
if you dont shutup
i'm gunna **** you in th arse in th brick
i'm tryin to watch this
a brick is a mini ya mad kiwi
how long you been here ?
***
once upon a time
she'd smiel at me
and give me a headjob
right
that's four thousand and twenty three ya owe me now
i knocked off ten for that one
that was a goodie
***
somethin about
that flyin in th dark
under th big trees
on th bicycle track
come into it and
cant see a ****in thing
how many cones did i have ?
cmon eyes
adjust
th unicycle's solid underfoot
this is about
two kilometres into th ride
i cant see th small sticks
dropped from th trees overhead
but i can feel them
underfoot
underwheel anyway
a cars light from th main road
pentrates th trees
it's still well down th road
th light
almost horizontal
casting weird long long shadows
thru th winding concrete path
as it gets closer
th shadows start to fill
but no other lights
on this unlit street
thru this section
maybe fifty metres
maybe a 100
not about distance
but time
th night vision
gets destroyed
and th full glare of th cars lights
cast its pall
deathly blue white glare
and shows me th th trees in stark relief
with th path im travelling
clearly defined
it drives past
and im blinded
gone so quickly
at eighty kilometres an hour
and once again
im on a unicycle
with virtually no vision
feeling
waiting for th
glare night blindness to dissipate
so i can see the shape
of the beast i'm riding
th trail undulates
as it picks it;s way thru th trees
and sure wheeeled
i fly thru it
with just th right amount
of marijuana inside me
to wanna record it in my diary
as a really ****in nice thing
every damn time i do it
todays music in th dark
flying music
was from
jewel
and kylie mingoue
[second pass]
i did not see that error
[second pass]
which is what i get get
for lettin th ****in mp3 player
play on random
i came out of th far end
in th gravel section
and under th lights cast from th big road roundabout and gas station
where i'm goin for a water drink
to kylie minogue's
'chocolate'
boppy little rhythm
and i had three ppl beep their horns at me
oh hello ppl again
after my second water break
first was in
wright place
a park a coupel of k's down th road
i went bush to see th cute chick in th fourby smile
thn crossed th road
and took th bike path down
th
back lane
i guess ya call it
all th bike paths linked around here
in between th housing estates
large open water drains
goin down to th creek proper
with a bike lane down th side
down that
no ****in ppl
pure unicyclin
at it's best
blind as a bat
cant see a ****in thing
just come out of fluoro lighting
it's dark in here man
i got no light
mor fun this way
used to ride with a dynamo light
on th flywheel
was a buzz for a while
<<< smile >>>
th first bit is steep
and right where yur vision's worst
a trap for th unwary unicyclist pilot
you cant see th bottom of th hill
from th top of th hill
just after ya come out of th lights
take me there sweetie
***
not as frightening
as ridin over th edge
onto th moving
downhill travellator
but there
you have excellent vision
***
th wheel needs a wash jennifer
still got salt and sand on it for ****'s sake
"ok man"
***
blister re****t ?
"good man"
alright
get th body showered
"barely raised a sweat"
just get it ****in showered and dont answer back
"ok man"
***
jenny did not have a loose arse today
"no she rode well"
***
"that tyre's ****ed paulie"
one on th car too
***
shower...
***
is that thing still playing ?
"sorry master"
"music - on - random"
***
cake
'short skirt - long jacket'
***
and big kinky boots
***
i had this ***** thought of you today
i apologize
may yur piles be small
..
..
..
the land surfer dude
***
p.s.
bjork
'violently happy'
hey jen
make sure ya get
feelin groovy
"cool as..."
