yoga ( dirty unicycle )
---
watchin dw tv
german news
***
more pot over here
***
"so when did we actually start doin yoga paulie ?"
when i was eleven
in europe
hippies everywhere in 1973
***
i couldnt tell my australian mates
an amerenglish hippie chick
in a poptop camper
at th oktoberfest
***
i got in th car
to go by some rollies
**** that unicycle stinks
somethin in th surf i think
nearly had my head out th window
***
think i just wanted a decent length cuddle
i slept in th hammock
***
i wanted to sleep in a ****in bed
leave me alone
***
free love goin on around me
all th time
***
**** i had a good time
***
i had done you a dis service
by never telling your tale
to anyone
th old lady knew
and th old man
he knew where to come lookin for me
i couldnt tell th white boys
i hung out with in australia
my first girl was a white girl
so th first one they ever knew about
was th black girl
***
this girl was teaching me yoga
<<< smile >>>
i know i was missin for a night
well i couldnt take her back to my hammock
you wanted to come here
***
this is th only park
that will let australian pass****t holders stay
***
every other german town i been in
been cool bein australian
***
no i'm
just not australian here
none of us are
i'm half dutch and half
whatever i think i can pull off
i can order food in german
yeah um
ok
i'll tell ya th places we found
where german was a real bad thing
and we found ya shouldnt try it
when ya cross th line
yeah i'll have another joint
***
be funny if i left a kid
in europe
like my old man did
***
yeah i can put
both my legs behind my ears
show me
ah yes
***
Röyksopp
Kings Of Convenience - I Don't Know What I Can Save You From (REMIX)
***
this is a norwegian song
it was nearly
a swedish girl
tiny little village
well off th beaten track
little closr to my age
about fourteen
they sent us off
to go and play
so she'd show me th town
hmmm
wasnt a real big place
we saw everything pretty quick
these folks had never seen
a black australian
something unique
and very rare
clomping around in clogs
on th mountain
steel capped clogs
mother's dutch dont ya know
i did get used to it
i came from
somewhere
black skin
or caramel as it may be
isnt valued at all
and mostly
talk like a white man
little curly haired dark boy
from th other side of th world
do you kids play spin th bottle ?
<<< smile >>>
i remember
lots and lots of fun
tryin to get
girls i couldnt talk to
had no language in common
to let me kiss em
i went thru puberty
wanderin europe
in 1973
***
you'd be in some
strange country
and th parents are inside
suckin down alcohol
us children
are left outside to amuse ourselves
i smoked cigarettes
smoked marijuana
and drank alcohol
i was eleven and a half
but hung out with fourteen year olds
they um
threw me in th grade seven football team
when i was in grade four
cause i was big for my age
i hated it
but it made me as a person
i was th smallest
kid
in th group
but
i was their hooker
in th scrum
and i was fearless
i had all these big guys
at my back
i could throw th first punch
at a grade seven boy
few of those guys
were at my high school
when i hooked up with em again
it was like havin bigger brothers
anyone hassled me too much
and my older brothers would
get a little narky
***
pissin down rain outside
we dont get rain here
like in europe
we have to make fog
for our parties in th bush
so th coppers cant find us
***
i ran a party house
a ten acre farm
that my brother and i owned
for about eighteen months
<<< smile >>>
had a parents vigilantee committee
threatening me
sending me messages
thru their own kids
still couldnt stop em comin
***
i had nothing to do
and i like ppl watching
so i sat
across from th king of th hippies raft
in amsterdam
free
id been around enough cities
and towns
my parents
were ok with me
goin off to have a look
seasoned
and home was
just across th canal
livin in a loft
gettin stoned just from th fumes
and watchin goins on
***
watching a hatch cover
pop
up
in a floating barge
at dawn
bout lunchtime for th hippies
a hippie head would emerge
and a cloud of steam
cant believe they live down there
must be so cold
no way
i;ve frozen to death in an alpine pass
i dont fancy it
in a
dutch barge
ok i'll come in for a cup of tea
<<< smile >>>
**** it;s hot in here
***
i met some really funny people
***
we were staying in this german village
and it was a no petrol day
w
e're stuck wherever we are
we no longer travel sundays
so th roads were
100% ice
and no ****in cars
man it was a golden time
you could sled
from end of a town
to th other
and only taxis
i think
and emergency vehicles
could be on th road
**** it was nice
runnin around this german town
was th first we struck it
not real big
but industrialized
so a decent size street
and we were out with th german boys
cra****n sleds
and anything we could get down th ice
no snow plow came thru
to clear th roads
ppl came outta houses everywhere
best sundays of my life
magical
petrol rationing
saw th most amazing things
ppl gathering together
to play
***
massive attack
"what your soul sings"
***
mum's sister
went to europe
after we came back
and wandered europe as a hippie
i know th things she saw
she came home and
ran a party house too
she did it first
as it happens
but th seeds
came from across th ocean
***
"kylie plans a family"
i spose ya could give birth in that position
***
driving thru belgium in th fog
real thick pea soup
i got high
in a kombi van
at th last truck stop
she was sayin goodbye
bugger it
you're gunna take a piece of my heart with you
you taught me about yoga
taught me to stretch
and i can never ever forget you
monica with th wild kombi van
***
my aunt told me once
i was gunna break a lot of hearts
that was at twelve
i wonder how much
my mother had told her
of our trip to europe
i broke some hearts in some strange places
th mother of one girlfriend said i had
something of th dark horse about me
she let me do anything i wanted
we got on a bit too well
that was one cut girlfriend
***
i was round havin coffee with your mum
***
i watch my eleven year old
nephew
sorry just gone twelve
chattin up girls
we were out together
last friday
on th beach
ridin unicycles in th surf
you know how proud your mum and dad were
young fella
when you were chattin up th tasty blonde
at your graduation
my mum and dad were pretty cool
took me to a pub
to celebrate
id happily
let all my memories
of all th lovely things that happend to me
in europe that year
disappear
but i cant forget you
never saw my mother smile so hard
you wanna know somethin monica
i made love to you
took me
fifty odd girlfriends later
till th next one
was
making love
i rang
th first girl i'd had *** with
you free ?
i learned how to make love
grew a brain maybe
i want a rematch
she said yes
we had a gorgeous weekend
***
no woman alive
has ever heard your name mentioned monica
my childhood was a litle too exciting
i couldnt talk about it
been thru paris
walked thru london
been in a communist country
lived in a peasant village
gotten lost in venice
got laid at oktoberfest
it's a ****in big party
funny things happpen
slept in an alpine pass
played spin th bottle with commie kids
on th other side of th line
kids are kids
been in a car crash
on an ice wall
on a ****in big mountain
did three somersaults easy
into th windscreen
from th back
in a commo country
been on th king of th hippies raft
pissed on some famous english beach
they;re rocks
ah man we bagged england
saw one day of sun
and th english came out of their doors
a horrible
white flacid sight
they said it ws a heat wave
i was cold
didnt have a ****rt on though
didnt that twist th english ?
****ing everywhere
we played yobbo in england
because ya can
i'd go to th shop
in thongs
and no ****rt
pair of stubbies
archetypal
twisted th sensibilities of th english
they complained
knocks on th door
about th colonials
th old man told us to
stop windin th english up
no seriously
th koalas are viscious bears
no we just lie
so th tourists will still come
gotta feed em somethin
<<< smile >>>
i mean
how ****in gullible ya gotta be ?
she's not fooled
hi
do you live here ?
can ya show me around ?
<<< smile >>>
where do ya go to have fun ?
sittin
talkin to some ppl my age
under a soccer stadium
they were teachin me soccer
id played football
rugby league
sorry
what we call football
i understand
i'll have to watch for that sort of stuff
i'm goin to lots of countries
we do like you do
we ride our bikes
bicycles
in th bush
and play
ok
thank you
yes i'd like to come to th pictures with you
i'll have to see my mother
to get some money for an adventure
england wasnt all bad
***
i hated th cheese though
what th **** are th oldies ravin about
it ****in stinks
we gotta sleep in here
***
my meeting is ten am jenny
not nine
***
little brother's home
bangin away in th workshop
dont buy a land rover
do youself a favour
***
i'll sell most things for nothing
but not land rovers
***
the stoners bible says
if they;re handin out free love in th streets
you;d be a damn fool not to reach out
and grab some of it
***
keep discovering
..
..
..
paulie
***
p.s.
"indiginous elders"
"local elders"
gotta be time to turn th tv off
***
massive attack
"hymn of th big wheel"
***
am i stoned now ?
***
scuse me
holding my breath
suffering th little death
***
gotta cough to get off
***
was going to trek out th door
for a pedal
on th unicycle
still drizzlin
rain
monday is my kickback day
not that i do much anyway
***
yesterday's ride was big down on redcliffe beach
killin time
sposed to meet rod
at th south end of th lagoon
gave me a call back later
was a bit slower gettin movin
than he thought
i been
pedalled up
pedalled down
pedalled in th water
played with a few waves
and had two swims
and at home
tryin to get th smell off my body
unicycle still stinks
still got beach sand on it if ya must know
***
occupying th passenger seat
***
massive attack
"inertia creeps"
***
it's all about balance
***
flying on a flywheel
***
i wanna go ride my wheel
but i rode yesterday
with wet trunks
and
blisters
been friction burned
little vitamin e creme
and fly tomorrow
***
full moon tomorrow
***
we'll ride th wheel
fresh
***
massive attack
"what your soul sings"
we stretch tonight
with fine music in th background
and remember th gorgeous blonde
who taught us
th plow position
beautiful blonde hippie girl
spending daddy's money
trekking around europe
<<< smile >>>
***
i couldnt share with my friends
twelve years old
who have never been away from home
sittin on a mountain with a pretty girl in sweden
in a home in zagreb playin spin th bottle
sitting in a cafe with a gorgeous italian girl in venice
playing in swiss town
during a summer festival
the grass long
and
th smells
seeing fjords
snow
pink snow
legoland in denmark
th little mermaid
eiffel tower
tower of london
monaco
hot chestnuts
in austria
cadging a ride to th next stop
in another hippie van
goin same way we are
lets travel together to
here on th map
liking
th ppl where we are
and stopping for a couple of days
to get to know them
finding someone who can speak english and jugoslav
so i could talk to my grandfather
i'd never had one before
we didnt wanna let him go
***
maroon 5
"she will be loved"
***
thanks
i was hurtin bad
yur right
i needed a really big cuddle
i was so cold
and so alone
sleeping in that hammock
in sub zero
and findin out he wasnt my dad
it was ****ing our good time
i dont wanna bring ya down
ya made me happy
yeah
he's hurtin too
he didnt wanna tell me
i stood there
when he saw all his brothers for th first time
and i was like
a stranger
and my grandfather picked me up
tears pourin out of my eyes
and just loved th hell out of me
we'd bribed th camp guards
so dad's younger brother
can come over th wire
in th communist army
so he can meet him
for th first time
***
pearl jam
"black"
***
i cant go home and tell these tales
cant go home with
i kissed a dutch girl
on a dyke
i get beaten up
without havin to make em jealous first
gotta go home to be
a black bastard
***
i dunno
ya hear a word or phrase
and it keeps recurring
and no-one will tell ya what it means
so ya walk out th door
cause
you live in lots of countries where you cant speak th language
and go look for someone
who will tell ya what it means
regretted that too
little black bastard
<<< smile >>>
be careful if you seek th truth
it can bite you on th arse
***
"ah **** off"
***
walkin in a german door
freezing ****in cold
been out playing in th snow
and i tell th whole assembly
i've got cold dogs
instead of
i've got cold hands
and they all ****in laughed at me
ok
what did i say this time that was so funny ?
